On Writing

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Whenever I’m trying to write something, and I can’t think of anything, I’ll have a little glass of wine to “prime the pump” as they say.  Then if I still can’t think of anything, I’ll have another little glass of wine.  And then, if I need to, a third.  On a good day I can keep from writing anything at all.

 

Solar

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Today I was driving on the freeway and I spotted a solar panel lying in my lane but I was going too fast to avoid it, and it must have somehow bounced up and punctured my gas tank and caused sparks because suddenly in my rear-view mirror I could see a trail of igniting gas chasing me down the freeway, and meanwhile all the cars behind me are swerving back and forth to avoid the flames, and a gas truck goes off the side of the road onto the railroad tracks next to the freeway and collides with an oncoming train and explodes in a huge fireball causing the train to derail and several tanker cars to burst open and flood a suburban neighborhood at the bottom of the train embankment with thousands of gallons of crude oil.  Man, and they say solar energy is safe.

 

 

The Circus

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How come you always hear about someone running away to join the circus, but you never hear about them staying in school and studying for a career in the circus?

 

 

Money

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One thing I’ve learned in life is that having money doesn’t lead to happiness.  But since nothing else does either, money is a pretty good thing to have.